We live in a throw away society. Anything we don't want any more, or if it doesn't make us happy, or suite our purpose we can throw it away. The biggest throw away of all being marriage.

Diabetics have a lot to deal with at the best of times. Not every married couple has the perfect partner, but something brought them together in the first place. If it was love shouldn't that be the strong glue that binds them together no matter what they have to face? Unfortunately, there is a school of thought out there that suggests if your partner doesn't give you the support you need, why no problem, you can dispose of him or her by walking away. All I can say to an attitude like that is how sad for both.

Whatever happened to couples being encouraged to sit down and talk about what they feel is the problem? Sometimes it is a case of educating the partner. Diabetics need to educate themselves and their partner when it comes to the type of diabetes they have. Diabetes is no respecter of age or the problems that can come with it. It can be fear of the unknown that can be a real negative for the partner. True, some don't handle new situations very well, so they want to run, hide, or deny any thing is different. They may even want to strike out and hurt the other partner. The striking out part can be the hardest for couples, as it usually becomes very emotional on both sides, with each one becoming defensive, opening the door to saying things that in that moment of time can not be taken back. Soon barriers are between them and neither one is willing to make the first move to break them down. In time the wounds fester and keep growing. One day one of them decides to leave, and away they go.

Wouldn't it be much easier to speak kind words to each other? Talk openly about the problem? Look for solutions? If the glue that binds two people together is indeed love then I know this is possible. Solutions, and yes sometimes compromising enters into the picture in order to find solutions, but through it all there is usually common ground to build on.

As mentioned earlier education on the subject is vital to both. It is not just for the person that has been newly diagnosed with diabetes. If both make it a positive challenge that they participate in together, the stronger their foundation will be. It takes time, and patience, and most of all the right kind of love two people can have for each other. Believe me that kind of love will stand the test of time. Mine has for 54 years now and still counting. Ours has had most of what life is all about and at times it has come in pretty big doses, but through it all we can say love brought us through it all.

By Norma Burns Comments(0) 2008-07-03 16:30:01